Swimming around in the Westin Calgary pool, we were both happy as clams. My son loves Minecraft (especially computer version) and asked if he could get a new MOD (translated to ‘modification of the original – I think). Personally knowing the student who had told him about add-ons to Minecraft, I was skeptical but decided to be open-minded. Daddy and I would research the MOD to see if it was appropriate.
Pushing me, my son explained that you could get a girlfriend and make ‘it’ do things. Red flag #2. He insisted his friend said there was a Youtube video that would explain it. And he wanted me to watch it NOW.
I looked and there were no age restrictions, so we watched it together.
For ten minutes.
And my heart sank deeper and deeper and I knew that we’d entered tech hell, a place that I may have to go back to school to understand because I can’t be a great parent without a full understanding of that world.
In the video (that was like a gender-biased, sexist train wreck I couldn’t stop watching), I learned that ‘mail-order girlfriends’ emerge from a box shipped to the miner. They do your bidding and their weapons are shoes tossed at the creepers. If you like, you can give them a sword but must take it back promptly. They are tamed with a rose and will do what you tell them once they are in love with you. You can dress them in 16 different outfits and if you draw them to water.. wait for it… they will change into a bikini! (Of which there are many styles as well). Building a dance floor of 5×5 bricks will compel them to dance for you to ensure your happiness. And finally, to break up with these creatures you just have to give them a dead bush. Hopefully the symbolism isn’t evident to my son.
I was silent. I asked my son how he would feel if it was me who got out of the box. He said he wouldn’t like it, but if you marry them with a diamond you can get a baby from inventory and even eat dinner together. At a table in a restaurant.
I explained that he had not done anything wrong, but that this particular MOD divided genders and included harmful thoughts about women. He still begged to get it and promised he’d never treat a girl like that in real life.
So I guess he realizes some of the negatives. But the weaponry, clothing changes and newness is still too enticing. And now I’m petrified.
This video has over 6 million views. Developers such as TheDiamondMinecart make or simply video and explain the workings of these MODS. They are certainly not screened for content. Parents who may think their child is playing ‘Minecraft’ has no idea about the can of worms introduced by coders who want to extend the range of the game.
So much for work. I’ll be looking over his shoulder from now on. And before he can download ANY SIM? He has to learn how to code and build the damn thing himself if he’s still interested. (Hopefully it will take a few years). There was a great article on Babble about teaching kids coding. Spanish can wait. Coding and the reinforcement of gender equality are next on the list. And just because you trust what you read about Minecraft and it’s developers, be careful not to consider all-things-Minecraft as kid-appropriate.
In the meantime? Any advice on how to deal with the family of the 7-year old who hyped the Girlfriend Mod would be much appreciated.
by Jill Amery
Great article Jill! From one Minecraft Mom to another (is that what we should call ourselves?) I appreciate the heads up!
Thanks Tenille. Minecraft Moms. Ha!
there are worse modifcations one is called the jenny mod
my son is also a minecraft junkie. if i could turn back time, i’d go back to before minecraft entered our lives. To me this game is filled with too many weird things. i don’t see the appeal at all. my son also likes to watch youtube videos of other people playing it. Those videos are one million times worse. Grown men playing video games and taping themselves is creepy by itself let alone the language they use while playing. If he wants to watch that anymore its with the volume off and we’ve extended that to the game. He hasn’t brought up this MOD yet but when he does i’ll be ready. Thanks
I agree that this particular mod is inappropriate but Minecraft IS a fun game, and the men AND women that make YouTube videos aren’t rapists or child abductors, they are creating entertainment for people that like to watch others play a video game (that the don’t own, aren’t good at, or just like the commentary of). I don’t like this mod; I believe in equality, but the people making videos aren’t bad people because they make videos, half of them (at least) get paid for it. I watch YouTube videos for commentary (the stuff they say) because they are amusing and (no offense) but having an opinion of all YouTube in a collective is contradictory to your equality stance; I have friends that are YouTubers (as they are called) and they are good people, heck one of them (MarkiplierGAME aka Mark) has charity drive videos and make thousands of dollars.
Adding an apposing stand point on all subjects since 1998 – Keenan
The main thing is that your son is watching the wrong YouTubers. Most of them actually don’t curse or use other profound language
I am a kid of age 14 and I watch the diamond minecart. He is a great youtuber, though he may accidently swear, he does a good job at making sure most MODs are age appropriate. The girlfriend MOD he did because too many people begged him to do a review on it. Out of annoyance he did the review. It’s not his fault if he accidently does a bad MOD. There are minecraft youtubers that are FAR worse language and content wise.
try letting him watch Dan the diamond minecart he i kid friendly hand has never said bad words so far
My son watches more Minecraft videos than he plays. He could sit there all day watching the videos. There are some women in those that he watches but they’re not much better than the men. He’s never shown me anything about this MOD.
WHAT?!? That is absolutely crazy! My kids haven’t talked about the MOD yet…I’m thinking no one has told them yet. I will be sure to keep an eye out for this one. Thanks for the heads up!
yeah you are definetely exhausted of your husbands divorce.
I don’t have any ideas on dealing with the other child, but you handled your own great. I am truly thankful that Minecraft has no place in our daughter’s lives.
Thank you so much Sheri! What a shocking video, huh?
I couldn’t even watch the whole thing. How to “use” her? Throwing shoes as defense? A girlfriend as your “minion?”
People say we’ve come so far with women’s rights. This is at least as bad as those games of “witches” we played in grade school where the boys would catch us and whip our legs with tree branches, huh?
Thanks for bringing my attention to this. It will be interesting to see my husband’s reaction to the video. He will probably dismiss it as no big deal. I, on the other hand, will be restricting the boys’ Minecraft access even more than we already do. It’s their favourite, and I won’t be popular.
To think I had a problem with the livestock requirement (can’t we be vegatarians if we want to in this game?)…
Yes you can be vegetarians… farming. Minecraft has also been known to raise children’s IQ, creativity, imagination, hand-eye coordination, and problem solving (strategy); plus stimulate grey matter development in the brain. (grey matter is important) No surprise it’s their favorite game, it is fun and uses the brain; it is most likely the safest and most all age appropriate game you’ll find (excluding mods). my advice is don’t let them use mods; vanilla (normal) Minecraft is fine on its own.
i think this can be true when its taught and guided…but like when my boys dad and grandma give them the computer and walk away…they watch whatever…play whatever and the only interest at 8 and 10 is i can kill mame and destroy his or that…they show no interest or knowledge of coding or anything new…my oldest is slightly autistic and obsesses over being able to kill or escape from being killed in any game…i see that theres a minecraft education mode for educators and i think this is much more appropriate for children than idly playing a game with little direction or purpose. JS
Or even better then not letting download mods, teach them to code and encourage them to make their own mods thus developing a potentially useful real life skill that could come in handy when they grow up.
P.S. This “Girlfriend mod” is actually part of a different mod called Orespawn, which adds a LOT of new content into minecraft and Girlfriends are really only a tiny piece of that mod.
You just dislike the game because you don’t see the whole perspective, just your own. Don’t make assumptions and restrictions about minecraft or really anything if you know so little about it and just because this one mod is mostly misunderstood. So, before you restrict your sons’ gaming time try to understand the game just a little bit above clueless. And always think, they could be playing something ALOT worse.
I did not mean to make offence, I was just trying to get my point across
The comement above was for Samantha Agad, not you, Keenan, sorry
Minecraft (without mods) = fine (better than fine) Mods are the problem not the game, don’t a kids favorite toy away when its the mods added that make it bad. Where’s the appeal? not to a woman in hr twenties (or older) or moms, but to kids and teens and what not; it is for anyone who likes it. Minecraft is way better than the stuff your kids could be doing now and days; anyone hear about Call of Duty, Dead Space, Grand Theft Auto, Red Dead Redemption, other games you can find on the internet, plus pornography. Taking away this game only open doors to much much worse. This is the age of Technology mothers, and technology will be used; hiding your children from the inevitable will only through them into the unknown when they leave. Generation X is here and is here to stay, change is going to happen if you like it or not; parents need to learn about what the real dangers to your kids are and not just wall off everything. apologies for rambling on but everyone needs to see everything from every angle, stand point, and opinion if equality is going to happen. don’t think of a hsband as any less a teacher than you or visa versa, you both are humans with experience and intelligence; that is what matters.
I agree with you completely
You pretty much mis-understood most of the mod or “add-on” because you watched thediamondminecart. You can’t “marry” them or eat dinner together or even make a baby with them. TDM takes mods and only shows you part of them, and often adds made-up things or even other mods to the mod showcase. With that, their basically just a pet that either throws stuff at other things or smacks them with a sword.
99% of mods out there are kid friendly, and if you don’t want your kid to think he can install it himself and ruin your computer, you’ll try to find someone that can do it correctly and let your kid install some appropriate mods (not saying this ones not if you watch the CORRECT review)
i would suggest before you get mad at thediamondminecart who does all minecraft things i would suggest finding to creator of the mod and getting piss at him
i would suggest before you get mad at thediamondminecart who does all minecraft things i would suggest finding to creator of the mod and getting pissed off at him
I just want to know how to download different mods? Anyone know how? My son is of course into Minecraft and I think it is very good for him as far as it being educational. I don’t know about Girlfriend Mod however, if we are good parents and teach our children I believe they will be fine. 🙂 It’s all about good parenting.
Go to the mod download page and it sould bring you to an adfly or midwa fier link dont click the download button (thats a virus) wait five seconds and click skip ad, in the top right hand corner, then the mod of your choice should start downloading then go and get minecraft forge for the latest version of that mod 1.8 1.7.10 1.7 ect… Your going to want to get the installer download not the sec or universle one, once thats done downloading befor you run it go into you start menu and type %appdata% thenclick roaming then .minecraft create a mods folder in the .minecraft folder, now run the viersion of minecraft you downloaded forge for once its done liading (on the minecraft menu screen) click quit game. You can now run the forge installer it should prompt you with two options( install for client) and (install for server) click install for client. Once thats dine installing run minecraft go down to users and click forge open up the .minecraft folder and drag the mod into the mods folder you created. now all you need to do is hit play and enjoy 🙂
You silly fools are taking this way too seriously, this mod was obviously created as something silly, not to divide genders or something crazy like that. If you would take the time to browse the mods that are made for this game there are THOUSANDS of silly ones like this and some far worse. Simply put it’s a game, stop crying, go back to work.
you got a snip of a mod the mod you describe is MUCH!!!!!! bigger its called orespawn mods this size get chopped up in videos to save time if I had to review the whole mod at once I would be talking for a week do your own research on mods they want there are some to avoid but most that get done are safe
I watch TDM and he Is a great YouTuber and barely ever swares and I’ve seen waay worse, and it can be bad but most popular YouTubers don’t swear much and the mod is for fun, and this is a girl (not a mom) saying this
I agree 100% with this. I know this article is a couple of years old, but if your son hasn’t already discovered it, maybe he’d like Minecraft Oasis? You can befriend and sometimes date/marry NPC villager characters (male or female)–so he could potentially have a ‘girlfriend’ character on Minecraft, but without the Stepford-esque creepiness of the Girlfriend Mod.
Thanks for posting this! My younger son is asking for the Mod now, which means kids are still talking about it. ICK.
As a minecrafter myself, I know what the moding community is like. Just as all situations, people blow things out of proportion quite a bit. The red flag is a good sign you are a good parent and I didn’t read all of the article to spare my temperament with the majority of parents bashing something they didn’t understand in the first place. Might I direct your attention to the site minecraftedu.com. This is a team of inspirational, dedicated staff that make learning fun. By using the mod in minecraft, kids are learning the coded language of DOS that you had to know in the early development of everything technological. Learning. Fun. Minecraft. Now the Girlfriend mod is something no different from the Helpful Villagers mod. It has the same features, without bikinis and changing clothes, and you are hiring a helper. The Little Maid mod is one of my favorites because the new NPCs will cook for you. But i’m trailing on. The point is, I applaud you for monitoring what mods your child uses, if any, and I’m happy there are still adults out there that do. But I haven’t seen many real good articles from parents about the game, and it usually comes from blown out of the water irrationalizing. May not be a word but you get the point. Learn the vanilla game. Look into mods. Prep yourself with knowledge. That’s the best way to handle it. Not writing articles. And maybe ask a mature Minecrafter. One that ISN’T obsessed. Moderation is key. Too much of anything is bad. Other than reading the bible. . That you can do forever.
OMG!!! And I though Minecraft was perfectly safe! Wow! I wonder who makes these mods. People need to be warned. I love this article!
Hmmm. I find this article interesting. I have the girlfriend mod, and well, it isn’t THAT bad.
i am a cow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
you are a gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im sorry my friend rocky kemper \\]f\]]\]jhgghgjk,jbmdv
This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time, despite seeing it late af.
Glad to see there are still those types of mothers in this world.
Though gender can be something bad, you seem to like to nick pick and ever single trace of sexism.
It’s honestly really unintelligent and funny as all hell to see.
This made my day
You guys are totally overreacting.
It’s a video game.