You are physically and mentally exhausted, you may not feel too attractive under that housecoat/sweat pants/yesterday’s clothes and you probably missed your daily shower. Not only that but you may be feeling quite sensitive about your weight or appearance post-delivery. Not exactly a recipe for romance! Your hormones are all over the place and may take awhile to readjust – loss of libido is very normal after pregnancy. Just know that you are not alone.
Several biological factors may be responsible for your lack of interest in anything but sleep in the bedroom. Apart from the sheer exhaustion of taking care of a newborn (or two!), if you are nursing your baby you may just want some ‘me’ time during which you aren’t being touched! Breastfeeding can suppress ovulation for months after birth, which is nature’s own method of birth control. In addition, the hormone prolactin, necessary for milk production, and the amounts of the hormones estrogen and progesterone in your body are well below normal levels, all of which combined have a major effect on your sex drive. If you have been prescribed a birth control pill that is safe to take when you are nursing, it will also have an effect. Don’t worry; it’s normal to feel this way!
Don’t forget that your relationship has undergone a major transformation with the addition (s) to your family. Things will take awhile to feel ‘normal’ whilst you both transition into your new roles as parents.
All you can do is try to connect with your partner in other ways whilst your body recovers. Remember that ‘breast is best’ and that these short-term trade offs are more than worth the health benefits of breast milk and bonding experience that breastfeeding provides.